I PROMISE not all entries will be this horribly long as it seems my first three posts have been an amateur attempt at a novel! There's just SOOOO MUCH to share to catch you all up on my journey so the information I will provide about our African Mission Trip will impact you (hopefully) on a heartfelt level as it does me! I promise soon I'll start discussing the African facts which is probably the most interesting to you all!
So I had heavy intentions on my heart & mind to pray about the calling for my life and Donny's life and that is what I did. I came to work the next week after the wonderful spiritual weekend at the Women's Retreat and the great sermon at church that Sunday in early April and I began working on my list of jobs to accomplish for the week. There was one job that I had pushed to the "back burner" long enough I nearly forgot to finish it. It was a simple "re-print" type of job for our vocations department, a prayer on a sandal shaped book marker that our Sister would pass out to young girls she met or give as a souvenir when she's been a guest speaker. I was gently reminded by a fellow coworker that I needed to finish the sandal job.(as we all know to well how often I need reminding!) I made it my top priority that day and when I grabbed the job, the prayer on that sandal absolutely resonated off the paper right into my soul. I had completed and reprinted this job many, many times during the 4+ years I've worked here but today it was as if I seen this prayer for the very first time...and indeed I was seeing it anew in sorts; the first time looking through the eyes of my heart. This prayer fit so perfectly into the time frame of my life as I'm praying for my calling and still not quite sure how to do this "prayer thing" correctly... these following words summed up exactly what I had been needing:
Jesus:
Teach me...
To see things,
AS YOU SEE THEM
To feel about things,
AS YOU FEEL ABOUT THEM
TO BE WHO YOU WANT ME TO BE! AMEN
EXACTLY! Doesn't that pretty much accomplish the same concept of praying for your calling, asking Jesus to teach me how to see life as he sees it! YES! YES! YES! THIS IS HOW I WANT TO LIVE!! I wondered how this beautiful, amazing, brilliantly SIMPLE prayer had not struck me before? As if I were BLIND ~ it had slipped right past me for 4 solid years! I'm just so glad I had procrastinated long enough that I didn't let this gem slip by me unnoticed for another year! So I began praying this easy lil prayer many times a day and I even shared one of the bookmarks with Donny hoping he might remember to say this one a time or two.
Another defining moment(or as I like to call it A DIVINE SIGN) that led me to "open my eyes" yet again to a broader range of view regarding my purpose in this spiritual life. The moment occurred during the few weeks of prayer where I had intently focused on receiving my & Donny's calling. I was in charge of sorting through some breathtaking photos that our sisters had taken while on a recent mission trip in Nicaragua and I was hanging on the edge of my seat as I sifted through all these 200+ photos barely wanting to waste a moment blinking! Each and every photo captured such an amazing story of their encounter with faith, healing, people, land, everything in God's beautiful creation was being represented in these photos through intense colors so enriched by life I would've swore I was seeing it vividly in real life.
Another sign or "coincidence" if you prefer; happened during the same weeks of prayer. An opportunity for some employees to partake in a mission trip to Mexico in 2009 was starting to rumble inside the convent walls and it peaked my interest instantly. The incredible Nicaragua trip had triggered something deep for me and I actually longed to be a part of those photographs! For the very first time IN MY LIFE an undeniable desire to leave the boundaries of my comfort zone (oh ya, and Minnesota) had awaken and I gazed at the Nicaragua photos imagining that "I could actually do something like this one day, how amazing would that be?!" All other mission photos that I had previously downloaded, all other mission stories that I had ever heard, all other simple vacation stories to foreign countries I had ever heard up to this point were always met with the same simple response in my dormant confined mind "Oh, how nice...FOR THEM, but that's definitely not my slice of pie. I could NEVER do something like that". BUT NOW....WOOOOAAAAH, stop the train...I'd like to get off this trip set on auto-pilot and start digging into all the hidden spiritual adventures I've been oblivious too! It's those "brand new eyes" again, seeing this world in a different light was also guiding my interests in a whole new direction! I chatted a bit to get the details about this Mexico mission trip in the making and I thought instantly "this would be a great opportunity for Donny, Zach and I to experience something faith-filled TOGETHER, we totally need this ~ SIGN US UP!" I had a few conversations with Donny and he agreed it might be a trip worth merit for our family to embark upon, with a year to prepare and save we might be able to make it happen...and so the "seed" was planted in our hearts, we could actually be missionaries in the making?!
The very next day after Donny and I discussed our possible participation in the Mexico trip my calling came bursting right through the front door of my heart like a wild bull! The pounding was so intense my poor little heart nearly jumped right out of my chest. I have this list of MANY adoption blogs that I kindly stalk on a weekly basis so I can live vicariously through their family miracles until my next adoption adventure is set to begin and I've become quite meticulous in my constant vigil of this online family that has found a permanent home in my heart. I have many of my "closer" connections saved under my favorites list for easy access when I need a dose of "adoption" like any addict would need easy and quick access to get their "fix". This day I accidentally landed on the missionary blog "a bright future". One that I mentioned before about catching my eye long ago and finding a home among my "favorites" list. Much to my pleasant surprise this blog had been updated for the first time in 7 months ~ I had checked it randomly over the course of these 7 months to sadly find no further entries. I began to wonder if it was blog that was no longer being used and this day I learned YES, OH YES, it was still a live site for there was the loooong awaited update. Out of all the times I had perused this blog I never paid any mind to the links on the right hand side and on this very day I "accidentally" landed on "a bright future" blog the link list caught my eye IMMEDIATELY! I seen a link titled "Visiting Orphans" and it literally reached out and tugged at my eyeballs daunting me to just CLICK HERE! I instantaneously clicked the link and was redirected to a missionary organization called "Visiting Orphans" where they, as you can imagine, lead trips to visit orphans around the world!!
At that indescribably serene yet simultaneously exhilarating moment it was as if the clouds parted and the sun began shining down on my face for the very first time in my life! It was like bells were a ringing, birds were a signing, the distant tune of a song that only plays when an epiphany comes to life was harmonizing my heart!! The holy grail of all treasures! I had found it!! HERE IT WAS = MY CALLING!!!! WITHOUT A DOUBT I KNEW IT!! Actually I could say it was more like eager screaming rather than calling! I was weightless; my spirit floating outside my physical body, dancing and celebrating ~ finally this girl had FOUND IT! (clapping should erupt here!) Everyone involved(well, mostly me & God) embraced this soul nurturing peace ~ I'm sure God was happy he didn't have to keep sending me "signs for dummies" like a kindergarten handbook. I had finally wrapped my mind around all he had been sending me for well over a year ~ the messages were no longer just static buzzing around in this "vacant" brain of mine! Through all the static over a year's time I finally found that one station that came in crystal clear and it was blaring my favorite tune ~ so it's time to start singing my heart out like I'm in the shower! It is the type of experience and sensation that you wish you could bottle up and share with every single person you know. Shout it from the rooftops, seriously you have to experience this for yourself! It would be the greatest gift I could give anyone I love..oh how I wish it was my gift to give! Words simply do no justice to the 'high' you feel! It's truly beyond all sensory comprehension! If you've ever received a call from God you know exactly what I'm talking about and if you haven't...I pray you will receive your gift of 'new life' from Him sooner rather than later!!
I emailed Visting Orphans Organization IMMEDIATELY to get further info and beg mercifully to find a loop hole to join this excursion because I had missed the registration deadline by about 3 weeks. This was IT, I honestly knew it would just work out...somehow I knew I would end up on one of these trips THIS SUMMER!! There was absolutely NO WAY I could wait until next year, not with this fire burning me alive from the inside out ~ it was going to happen now, I could feel it from the tingling in my toes through the pounding of my heart all the way up to the sensation in my brain! The pitiful begging email was sent, now I had to patiently await a response! I returned back to Amanda's blog site "a bright future" to read her current entry that I had completely skipped over...and it was yet another inspiring, beautiful spiritual story that moved me. I left her a comment with my support, stating my interest level in her amazing blog and left my contact information and basically "the rest is history"!! Amanda contacted me and informed me of her next mission trip she was leading to Ethiopia & Rwanda and my jaw dropped on the floor when she took a leap of faith and invited Donny and I to join. We had only a few days to decide as we'd be joining this trip in the 'nic of time' just before ordering their plane tickets! The Visiting Orphans site didn't pan out as we truly had been "too late" to sign up ~ no loop holes to be found. Yet some how the funny little thing seem to pan out just right and we landed on a mission trip to Africa to fulfill our destiny of becoming the loving hands & feet of our Saviour! What an honor and a pleasure to get from "there" to "here" in an amazing year of growth exponentially as a family and spiritually as a woman, mother, wife, and most importantly FOLLOWER of Jesus! Amen to that!!!
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